Have hope, chase joy, embrace life – recovery is possible.

Posts tagged ‘America’

Don’t Put Off Your Happy Life

“We give up the things we love, in order to chase what society tells us we need to be happy. But we will never find happiness through the giving up of what we love – in fact, it is only through a loving participation in those things, & through loving ourselves that we will ever find true happiness.” ~ lifeinfullcolour

I recorded this insight in an email to my psychologist during my trip to America, back in August – a trip which was filled with insights & growth, & one of the most recovery-strengthening experiences of my life.

I had been reflecting on my recovery, & all that i had gained thus far during my journey (both my broader recovery journey, as well as my physical journey to the US), & i realised, that the things that i was now able to find so much joy in, had always brought me joy, but more importantly, had always been available to me.

When i became entrenched in my eating disorder, i began to give up a lot of the things that made me happy, in order to chase society’s thin ideal. I gave up going out with my friends, i gave up going to parties. I gave up inviting people over for dinner, i gave up eating dinner. I gave up going to the beach, i gave up going to uni, i gave up going anywhere at all. I gave up all of these things & more, because they “got in the way” of my eating disorder. Now when i look back, i realise that i had actually let my eating disorder get in the way of my life.

I realised while i was in America, cooking & enjoying meals with friends, swimming, going out, meeting new people (experiences i had reclaimed during my recovery) that i don’t need to be thin in order to do these things. I don’t need to be thin to be happy – i can be happy right now. And knowing that it is possible for me to be happy right here & now at this weight, makes it easier for me to resist those voices that say “lose weight & you will be happy”. I have the experience now to say that being thin in no way guarantees happiness, nor does being a higher weight guarantee misery. When i keep this is mind, it makes it easier for me to “yes!” to life, rather than no, to get out there & do the things i love – the things that bring me joy – & not let my appearance hold me back.

So my challenge to you today, is to think about what it is that you would really love to do – & go out & do it! Don’t let your weight, shape, or appearance become an excuse for not living your own happy life.
Life may be a rollercoaster, but it has no height (or weight, or any other) restriction that you must meet before you can hop on – in fact, you are on that rollercoaster already, so you might as well enjoy it!

Your mantra for the day?

I will not use my appearance as an excuse to put off my happy life. I live my life fully & with joy, right now – i will not wait to be thinner/more toned/more anything in order to be happy.

What will you do today to live a happy life?


Things To Be Thankful For – Weekly Roundup

In a week which has been, for the most part, quite overwhelming, & at times just downright depressing, i am thankful for these shiny moments of hope & life, & things that made me smile:

  • The beautiful family of (9) kangaroos that live in the bush by my house
  • The Beatles – because “all you need is love.”
  • The echinacea that is growing on my windowsill
  • Meditation
  • Recognising that prevention is better than cure, & accepting  the support i have been offered
  • This blog post (on rape apologism)
  • This t-shirt:
  • My lovely friend E. for being nothing more or less than her beautiful self, & for sharing her friendship with me
  • Fresh raw veggie juice
  • Glorious sunny days, with their blue skies, warmth & gentle breezes
  • Exploring rock pools with my sister
  • My beautiful kitty cat Tigerlily, for knowing when her (adoptive) mummy needs snuggles, & for letting me nuzzle my head in her fur, & breathe in her loveliness 🙂
  • Walking through Newtown in my Oscar the Grouch PJs at 10 o’clock in the morning.
  • My purple hippo Henrietta, who travels everywhere with me (even to America!), & snuggles with me at night
  • ‘Forty Thieves’ solitaire
  • Sabbaba’s vegan falafel plate
  • Sunflowers
  • My lovely, bright pink, Summery dress, which i have been living in since i bought it a week ago
  • My beautiful friend A. for listening, for believing in me, & for always, always being there – i love you ever-so-muchly ♥
  • Big cuddly dogs 🙂
  • My little sister C., who is no doubt the light of my life – i absolutely adore this girl (yes, yes – i know i’ve said that before :P)
  • Being able to sleep in my bed again, after many weeks on the futon – my mummy bought me a new mattress as an early birthday gift! 😀
  • The comforting smell of a live Christmas tree
  • J., for noticing that things haven’t been “quite right”, & for sharing your awareness with me
  • A rather amusing sunburn (in case you can’t see it, i have a white patch on my shoulder, that was shielded from the sun by a forgotten sticker – it’s much more noticeable in person)
  • A lovely, supportive dietitian
  • Automatic car washes
  • G., for being one of my dearest & loyal friends, & for always making me feel accepted, exactly as i am
  • Knowing that“this too shall pass.”

What are you thankful for this week?

Things To Be Thankful For

  • Waking up with the sunrise – light streaming in through the wall to wall windows of my hotel room
    (where i checked myself in yesterday, after deciding that i really needed some time out from the stress that is my life right now).
  • Starting my day with a fresh raw veggie juice – a comforting familiarity.
  • Sweating out my nervous energy in the gym, but knowing when to stop.
    (Note to endorphins – i love you).
  • Blueberries & a juicy, juicy mango for breakfast 🙂
  • NOT missing my train
    (even if i did have to run through the hotel to get there in time).
  • Watching my gorgeous little sister dancing in her school’s Christmas concert 🙂
    It’s the first time i’ve seen her perform, & i was so proud of her! She was having so much fun 🙂
    (Apologies to my future kids – i am going to cry with pride at pretty much everything you do).
  • A hot & sticky Summer evening
    (even if i did spend a lot of time complaining about it! ;))
  • My new ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ DVD, which arrived in the mail today 🙂
    I fell completely & utterly in love with this movie, when i saw it in America earlier this year – which was coincidentally, a little ‘Eat, Pray, Love’ journey of my own! 🙂
  • My beautiful American friend A. for sharing her photos, & reminding me of the incredible time i had there with her 🙂

What are you thankful for today?